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June 8th, 2006
05:30 pm
My cat Echo is a mean drunk.
A while back, we took Echo to the vet for various routine vet-type things. The vet noted that two enzymes in Echo's blood were at higher levels than is normal, and that this indicated inflammation of the liver. Yesterday, the vet shaved Echo's belly and did a biopsy so that technicians can test Echo's liver tissue to gain clues as to why it's inflamed.
Despite my attention-grabbing initial sentence, alcohol is not the reason. The vet had to dope Echo up for the operation. She gave Echo a tranquilizer called Kedamine (which has also been historically taken by club-goers, and is known to them as 'K' or 'Special K').
When we got Echo home, Echo was still pretty woozy. Her first action was to hiss at our other cat, Oscar, and to take a swipe at him. She then staggered down the hall toward her food dish, weaving like a land-lubber on a rocking 'L' train. She growled and hissed at Oscar for the rest of the night--the poor guy had to run and hide under the spare bed to avoid her drunken wrath. At one point, I encountered her in the kitchen. She blinked at me blearily a few times, and then began to meow demandingly at me, increasing in volume, until I ended up having to shout over her that I didn't know what she wanted (me not being at all fluent in Domestic Short Hair).
She eventually collapsed into a doze on her favorite perch, and slept through the rest of the night.
She's doing much better today, and is back to her usual self.
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November 4th, 2005
02:39 pm
I had my eye appointment today. Everything looked good with my retinas, and I now have a prescription for new glasses! Yay!
I tried to start my novel. I got 455 words in, and I thought to myself, "I don't know what the fuck I'm doing." I felt unprepared, and I felt like a fraud. Some part of it is my internal editor saying, "This isn't as good as so-and-so's first novel, and he wrote it at age twenty-three!" Another part was that I'm really not prepared. I had a very loose outline in my head, but it wasn't enough to get me to finish even one scene.
Cat seems to have had better luck so far, though he's been collecting notes for many months now. I think I need to do that.
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October 24th, 2005
03:42 pm - Happy thoughts
They are turning my apartment building into condos. We've been told we need to move out sometime between the first of November and the end of December. I am really unhappy about this because we have a gorgeous apartment where maintenance requests are answered in a timely manner. And we only got to live there for six months.
My boyfriend Cat and I went apartment hunting on Saturday. We found a huge-mungous two-bedroom with a nice kitchen and bathroom. Oddly enough, it's right across the street from our old apartment. We've applied for a lease, and are in the process of getting our new place.
This makes me happy.
Today, my co-workers and I almost dined at a place we jokingly refer to as Milfies. The manager is an attractive forty-something empty-nester one might classify as a MILF (the acronym popularized by the movie American Pie). Milfies is closed on Mondays though. On the way to discovering this, I stepped in a puddle and my shoes flooded with water. When I got back to work, I ran my socks and shoes under the air dryer in the rest room. My socks and shoes are still a little damp, but very toasty.
This too makes me happy.
I have an appointment with the cute eye doctor next Friday, on the 4th. Hopefully, this is the appointment where he tells me that my eyes are done healing from the retina-reattachment surgery a few months ago, and that I can finally get a prescription for new glasses and contact lenses. Right now, trying to read is somewhat difficult. Text swims around on the page and screen as though my astigmatism has changed. The smaller the text is, the harder it is for me to 'pin it down'. When I can get my new glasses, reading will not be a chore anymore.
This makes me happiest of all.
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October 19th, 2005
11:33 am
Alright, I did it.
I have signed up for NaNoWriMo. I am going to try to write 50,000 words during the month of Novemeber, and shape them into a novel.
I made a pact with my boyfriend Cat, if I write a novel, he'll write a novel. He's been preparing to write one for a long time now. I think it'll be good for both of us.
It's also scary.
I had been thinking that I didn't want to reveal the working title of my novel for fear of somehow jinxing things, but after reading through some of the other titles just here in the Chicago area, my courage has been bolstered.
Here are some of my favorites:
- Unga Bunga Eats Munga Funga by storychef
- Uhm. It will have something to do with Snail. by rosemilk
- PHDS or "One Time at Orchestra Camp" by Anrea
- A Bad Hair Day...of the Dead by CarolynGray
- This Book is Not About You by KitKat
- The Sweater Girl and the Ice Gun by jasonmojica
- Clone Father, Put Down Thy Raygun by mrdankelly
My tentative title is merely David.
The rest of the details I'm keeping to myself for now, though I'd love to see what genre and plot you think my novel will have based just on the title alone.
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August 16th, 2005
06:21 pm - Eye Surgery Update
I should have posted this sooner, but I called the cute eye doctor last Friday. He told me that it was normal for my pupil to not have contracted yet this soon after the surgery, and that I shouldn't expect it to for about a week. So, I've still been wearing the funky shades that fit over my glasses. That is, I've been wearing them until last night. My pupil has begun to react to light again. Today at work I went all day without wearing my shades, and it was nice. Granted, I set my monitors' brightness levels down to zero, but it was still nice.
With the disappearance of the light sensitivity issue, the only thing left to bother me is the blurriness. I have to wait until the 2nd of September before I can get new glasses. Until then, I can't really read anything printed in normal size--which means I can't read any of my books. I think that this is how my mom and grandma must feel when they try to find just the right distance to put print away from their faces so that they can read. Only in my case, there is no right distance. I can read monitors just fine, because I can (and do) change the font size. I suppose that this is one advantage of e-books that I hadn't thought of before now.
My eye looks better too. It is no longer the Baleful Eye of Sauron. It merely looks very bloodshot.
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August 11th, 2005
07:34 pm
For the morbidly curious, my boyfriend Cat has posted the procedures done to my eye. I haven't actually looked at this link, and I don't want to know what's behind it.
I saw the cute eye doctor again on Wednesday. I thought about saying that he was a sight for sore eyes, but I haven't actually gotten a good look at him again since before the operation. Cat assures me that he's still cute, and that he smiles at my jokes. I am no longer taking eye drops to keep my right eye dilated, but it still hasn't contracted after over forty hours. I'm still wearing the stylish shades. If my pupil is still dilated tomorrow morning, I'm calling the doctor to find out if this is normal. At least it no longer feels watery and sore. Apart from the light sensitivity and blurriness, it almost feels like a normal eye again.
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) pheret1 asked about my tongue piercing. I'd reply directly to her comment, except that I don't want to see Cat's reply to her comment. My tongue stud is back in. My tongue had started to heal over, but not so much that I couldn't gently ease the jewelry back in. My tongue has been pierced for for about eight years now, and it felt very strange to have it absent. I'd started to get used to it, and now that it's back, my tongue feels as strange as it did before.
In non-eye news, my mom has started reading my livejournal. Everyone say 'hi' to my mom. She says that I'm a good writer. I should point her to some of your journals.
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August 7th, 2005
10:34 pm - Arr Matey!
I got my pupils dilated on Friday so that the guy at Pearle Vision could take a look at my retinas. Apparently, this is a procedure that people as near-sighted as I am ought to get done once a year. It seemed to him that the retina in my right eye was slightly detached. The detachment was occurring far from the center of the retina, so I never noticed any change in my vision. I was not able to see anything in the upper left quadrant of my right eye. This area is above the frames of my glasses, so I can't focus on anything in that area anyway.
The Pearle Vision guy freaked out.
He tried to get me in to see a specialist immediately, but it was 6pm on a Friday, and none of the specialists he knew were in their offices. He made me promise to call a specialist first thing on Saturday morning.
My boyfriend Cat called the number for me. As I figured would be the case, no one would be in until Monday at the earliest. The Pearle Vision guy called me at home later in the day, and told me to check myself in at the ER at Rush University Medical, and that they would summon the specialist on-call. I did.
The first eye doctor who looked at my eyes was very cute. He was also very personable and probably playing for my team. Including him and the Pearle Vision guy, I had five eye doctors shining bright lights in my eyes this weekend. Four out of five thought that I should have surgery immediately. I did.
I was disappointed too. I had been invited to a party that night that I was considering going to. I had also been looking forward to seeing some of the movies at cassielsander's movie party, especially Ridicule.
Many of you know how squeamish I am about my eyes. I refused to hear the details of what they were going to do. They tried to describe the procedure in as basic terms as possible, but even that made me squeamish. It didn't help that a line from Debaser by The Pixies kept running through my head, "Slicing up eyeballs! Oh ho ho ho!" I made them tell Cat all the gory details instead.
So yesterday, I had emergency eye surgery on my eyes. Yep, both of them. After I went under, the eye surgeon determined that my left eye needed it too.
I also lost my tongue piercing. They needed to take it out before putting in the feeding tube. I might put it back in later, if the hole hasn't healed over. I'm still thinking about it. My mouth feels empty without it.
I went home last night with a patch over my right eye. The left only had laser surgery, and so I was able to see out of it already--not that it mattered, without my glasses I might as well walk around with my eyes shut. My eye patch was not as piratical as I was hoping, but I did get in an "Arr Matey!" or two.
Today, the cute eye doctor took the patch off my right eye. He said that I'm recovering more quickly than normal, which was also the case for my many ear surgeries and the surgery to yank my wisdom teeth. I can now see out of both eyes, though they get watery easily. Also, the prescription has changed in my right eye. It had been 20/20 with my glasses on. It is now 20/40. This is an effect of one of the procedures I don't want to think too much about. If anyone is interested, I may have Cat write up what they did so I can post a link to it--a link I don't plan on reading.
I can't get new glasses for about a month, so the vision in my right eye is going to be bad until then. I believe I have to wait for the eye to heal and settle on its new prescription. Sadly, it's supposed to remain worse than it was.
I have to take three kinds of eye drops for my right eye. One of them keeps the pupil dilated, so I'm wearing these stylish shades that fit over my glasses.
artegal and ocannie, I'm not going to make it to GenCon this year. We'll try again next year. attackmonkey and bobbler, I don't think I'll be up to running Exalted this weekend either.
I'll keep you all posted as events unfold.
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July 27th, 2005
03:30 pm - What I value the most
Yesterday, rollick began her own version of the interview meme. I asked her one question and then another. I'll answer her questions later. For now, I want to write about my reaction to these two bits from her answers:
you expect people to be more revealing, more giving, or more inquisitive than you are
and
you actually pay attention to other people like they're important or something
I think these two things are related, and I also think that they both reflect the thing I value most in life: good company.
My first trip out of the United States was to visit My Favorite Jason in London. We had broken up just before he left the country (I'll admit, he broke up with me, and for some good reasons which are outside the scope of this journal entry). While he was there, we exchanged a few emails discussing the possibility of getting back together. I took a two-week vacation to go see him.
Things did not work out. After one week, we were bickering, and I had to get out of his hair. I took a vacation from my vacation, and took the bus (which took a ferry across the channel) to Amsterdam for three days. His friend Alyse had never been to Amsterdam either, so I went with her. I had not met Alyse before this, and she and I had very little in common.
Being in a foreign country with only a total stranger for company served to make me even more self-reflective than I already am naturally. I enjoyed the museums and the drugs, but I was otherwise pretty isolated, and I felt very alone. I came to the conclusion that what I wanted more than anything else in life was quality companionship. Sex and small-talk are okay, and sometimes very enjoyable, but what I really want is a meaningful connection.
With meaningful connections with other people being what I cherish most, I pay attention to other people like they matter to build those connections and to show that I care. I sometimes wear the persona of a misanthrope, but people really do matter to me, more than anything else. I equate this level of attention so strongly with caring and with what I value, that when I don't see it in other people, I do sometimes feel like they don't care and that they don't value me in return.
I don't think that what I expect of other people is that they be more revealing, more giving, or more inquisitive than I am (though maybe I do and this is a blind spot). I think what I expect of other people is that they just show me that they are receptive to me--I can be more revealing and more giving if I think that someone is paying attention. I'd like to think that I don't expect the same level of attention I am capable of, but by comparison, I often feel like no one pays any attention to other people whatsoever.
I have no idea how clear I'm being. Can I clarify anything?
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July 26th, 2005
05:20 pm - Two Movies
I saw two movies over the weekend that I thought deserve a mention here.
On Friday night, rollick showed us Dave McKean's MirrorMask. It was pretty to look at, but the story was only so-so. It seemed like a derivative combination of The Never-Ending Story and Labyrinth. Folks who liked either of these two movies should probably give MirrorMask a try when it comes out.
On Saturday night, my boyfriend Cat and I watched Pedro Almodovar's Bad Education. Cat was astounded that I had not seen an Almodovar film before. Anything I say about Bad Education will probably give the story away. You'll just have to trust me that it's good. I would recommend it to anyone who likes mildly dark films. If you don't like subtitles or gay men, you should stay away.
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July 25th, 2005
02:15 pm
Today, the proprietress of Mr. Thai said I ate my food like a little kid.
I eat lunch at Mr. Thai about once a week. The lunch special includes an appetizer, soup, and a main dish for $6.50. The food is decent, but not spectacular; it meets my needs. Once a week is often enough that the proprietress recognizes me when I come in. I guess I am a Mr. Thai regular.
A few weeks ago, the proprietress noticed that I didn't eat any of the mushrooms on my plate. She confided that she also did not like this particular kind of mushroom--though really, I don't like any mushrooms. She said that I could just order my food without them. So today, I tried that.
With most foods, I tend to finish all of a particular type of food before moving on to the next type. To use an example from today, I ate all the chicken, and then all the dark green peppers cut into cross-sections, and then all the green peppers cut length-wise, and then all the red peppers cut length-wise, and then all my rice. As she walked past the table, the proprietress noticed I hadn't yet touched any of the green and red length-wise cut peppers. She said that if I didn't like bell peppers, I could get my meal without those too. When I said that I liked to eat things in order, she laughed, and said I ate like a little kid.
Maybe this is common for kids to do, but my mom and my sister both do it too. It used to drive my old step-dad nuts. A lot of small things inexplicably drove him nuts. Of course my mom, being my mom, would deliberately eat her food in some order just to aggravate him. I know I can just scoop a wad of mixed things into my mouth. I could also switch back and forth between unmixed foods (like potatoes to turkey, and back to potatoes). I've tried to do this to appear more 'adult' before. I just don't like it. I enjoy my food more when I can enjoy a thing all by itself before moving on to the next thing.
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July 18th, 2005
04:22 pm
My (literally) fried AC unit was replaced on Friday. My management company has been very responsive about maintenance requests. I'd endorse them except that all my neighbors are convinced that they are planning on kicking us out and selling the building to condo developers.
On Sunday, I bought my first cell phone. My feelings on cell phones are still mixed.
Today, I will go get a much-needed hair cut.
Friends-locked post to follow.
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July 14th, 2005
11:21 am
Kung Fu Hustle is the awesomest movie in the world!
Okay, maybe not the awesomest, but it's definitely one of those movies that I regret not writing first.
I did not end up showing to Brew and View until after 8pm. I've already reported here that Jason switched days on me. Well last night, Jason decided that he wanted to meet prior to meeting everyone else. Then he decided that he wanted to eat. Then he decided that he wanted the biggest item on the menu. Then he decided he couldn't walk and eat at the same time without getting food all over his shirt. Why is he more high maintenance now than he was when we were dating?
Perhaps the real question is why do I put up with this if he's not putting out?
That's, I say, that's a joke son. I get grumpy with him, but I still care about him very much.
Even though I showed up late, coolerbythelake serendipitously found one of my co-workers (previously referred to as Loves-the-Lasses) and his wife. Jason was right when he assured me that everything would work out, but I still feel like I was discourteous by not showing up when I said I'd show up.
Sin City was still fun the second time. I could anticipate the times I should turn my head and not watch. I also spotted a few things I hadn't spotted before. For instance, we catch a glimpse of Dwight at the bar during Marv's vignette. Dwight even has a voice-over during Marv's vignette. I remember seeing this the first time, but not knowing who the Dwight character was yet, I promptly forgot about it.
Kung Fu Hustle remains awesome. Oh. My. God. The Awesomitude.
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July 13th, 2005
01:49 pm
Tonight: Sin City and Kung Fu Hustle!
I'll be in front of the Vic from about 7:30-ish to 7:45-ish.
I look more or less like the icon I used for this post. My new glasses are more narrow.
Let me know if I should be waiting for you.
Whee!
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July 12th, 2005
01:39 pm
I had to call the fire department this morning.
This morning, the AC unit in our kitchen caught on fire. It began by making these electrical popping sounds which put both our cats in fight-or-flight mode. It then began to smell like something burning. I turned it off at that point, but the popping sounds continued. I had to get to work, but I decided that I could be a little late if it meant that my apartment building didn't burn down.
The popping continued until eventually there was this nasty 'zorch' sound, and sparks began to fly out through the grille on the front of the unit and smoke began to pour out the back. Luckily, the smoke came out the part that sits outside. Oscar ran under the bed to hide, but Echo, the braver of our cats, continued to watch the AC. Her tail was fluffed out almost as wide as she is.
I already had the phone in hand, and I dialed 911. The nearest fire station is only about two or three blocks away. I pass it every day on my way to and from work. The fire truck had arrived before I could get my shoes on and meet them outside.
The AC had finished its temper tantrum by the time the fire fighters got to it. They confirmed that it was done burning. They also reassured me that calling them was the right choice, and that it was probably a good thing I was home to turn it off when I did. That was a relief. I didn't want to have called an entire truck out just for my smoking AC unit.
All day I've been tense. I want to call up my cats and make sure they're okay, and that nothing is on fire.
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July 11th, 2005
06:39 pm - A Change of Plans
Jason has informed me that we will be attending the films at the Brew and View on Wednesday of this week. I tried to tell him how excited all of you were about seeing the movies on Thursday, but he ignored the zoetropical protests I issued on your behalf.
So, we're going on Wednesday. I'm sorry if you had been planning on going and now can't.
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July 10th, 2005
10:21 pm - Brew and View This Thursday
Sin City and Kung Fu Hustle are both playing at the Brew and View this week. Jason and I are going on Thursday. Even Cat said he might go. Who all is up for joining us?
Whee!
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July 8th, 2005
03:15 pm - Coffee
I never thought that coffee would become part of my daily routine.
I like coffee. I like to drink it in greasy spoon diners while I graze on scrambled eggs. I like the occasional tall from Starbucks after Cat and I have slept in on a weekend day. I don't like the distress coffee inflicts on my digestive system. I feel miserable if I don't have a full stomach while drinking coffee. For this reason, I never drink coffee in the morning when I get up. When I wake up, I'm generally bright-eyed and bushy-tailed anyway, and not in need of a caffeine injection.
But I've come to need coffee after lunch. I've always had a problem staying awake after I eat lunch. At previous jobs, and through school, I'd used Snickers bars to keep me awake during these times. I'm not really sure that coffee is better for me than Snickers, but I suspect that the coffee is less likely to add to my small programmer's belly, and that's on my priority list right now. Yesterday, I skipped my after-lunch coffee, and I briefly nodded-off at my desk. I had to engage myself by looking for interesting web sites. Neither was particularly productive, but I think it was better to be seen downloading Fantastic Four desktop wallpaper than to be seen napping at my desk.
Today, I got my coffee. I think I'm going to have a develop an afternoon coffee habit. Sadly, the two nearest places I know of to get coffee are Mellow Grounds and Dunkin' Donuts. The coffee at Mellow Grounds is okay, but I've had bad luck with their food, and I'm disinclined to keep patronizing them. Maybe J can recommend someplace else close by.
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July 3rd, 2005
04:10 am - Bar Night
My Favorite Jason dragged me to karaoke at Bobby Love's (again) tonight. I actually had a great time though. I think the highlight was when an older black man going by the name of Buddah (sounds like 'butter') got up to sing:
Buddah: I want song number 1350, baby.
DJ (who is hot, for the record): Um, are you sure? Look at the screen and confirm that.
Buddah: Yeah, I'm sure. Number 1350. Okay white people, start clapping your hands like this. [demonstrates hand-clapping for the rhythmically-impaired].
Song number 1350 was Sweet Caroline. Buddah did a deep-voiced, soulful rendition that was. . . unexpected and amazingly fantastic. I was floored. Buddah--and many of the others I saw sing tonight--made me want to take voice lessons so that I could do karaoke as well as they did.
After Bobby Love's, Jason and I went to Charlies, which was less fantastic. We ran into an old acquaintance we'd known from our Berlin days, Bucky. At first, I was happy to see him. But Bucky was clearly tweaking on crystal meth, and that was a big downer for me for the rest of the evening. Gay boys of Chicago: please, please, please stop doing crystal. I've lost enough of you to HIV that I don't need the rest of you finding other creative ways to get sick.
I danced some. I have not actually danced in a very long time. I am happy to report that I still have 'it'. People around me take notice when I dance, and it's definitely an appreciative kind of notice, and not an amused or annoyed kind of notice. I'd like to resume dancing on a regular basis if I could find a place I enjoy dancing at.
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July 1st, 2005
02:30 pm - Gaiety
I came out to my first co-worker today. He's not the first co-worker I've ever come out to, just the first at my new place of employment.
Note: When coming out to a co-worker while sitting across from him at lunch, keep your feet still. Do not shift your foot and accidentally bump yours against his.
Coming out at GCS was very easy. Of the ten male employees, five were gay. Coming out at BA was also easy. Of the four male employees, all four were gay. I'm pretty sure, however, that I'm the only gay guy here at my new job. That's fine though, because the nerd factor is higher here than it has been at my other jobs.
And since we're on the topic of gaiety (thanks for the best-fitting word, cassielsander), on the way back from lunch, we passed an antique store. This reminded me of a story that I want to share.
When I was volunteering for the crisis hot-line many, many moons ago, I got a call from a woman wanting to know where the local antique shops were. This didn't seem like a crisis, so I asked her to tell me why she was calling. She said she had just moved, and was lonely. Where she had lived before, she had met some nice gay men at an antique store and become friends with them. She wanted to locate local antique stores in her new location because she wanted to make friends with local gay men. I redirected her to taking about feeling lonely, because that's what I was there for.
That was the first time I was ever introduced to the stereotype of gay men and antique stores. I've since learned over the years that this is a common stereotype (with some small basis in fact). I think about this phone call almost every time I see an antique store. The idea of cruising an antique store for friends instead of hook-ups pleases me.
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June 29th, 2005
11:05 am
I'm backing up a database at work. While I wait, I think I have enough time to tell you about my weekend.
My mom was getting married on Saturday. Cat and I bought train tickets for Friday afternoon. Thursday had been in the nineties, and the weather forecasters predicted that the whole weekend would be hot. I called my mom up on Thursday night to tell her that I was not going to wear a suit jacket in this heat. I was not even going to pack it in the garment bag. My mom had said that the ceremony was casual, and so I was going to go with a dress-shirt and tie instead. I had wanted to wear the suit--I think it makes me look sexy--and I had told her that I would before I knew how hot it would be. She was disappointed that I changed my mind, but accepting.
While we were setting aside our clothes to pack, Cat half-jokingly suggested we make sure to wear shorts on Friday because the AC on the Amtrak train was bound to fail. He was only half-joking because it seems that on every train trip we've taken together, something horrible has gone wrong. The worst was coming back one evening after Thanksgiving at my mom's. Our car lost all electricity. This meant we lost all lights (and it was dark outside), we lost all heat (and it was November), and we lost the ability to flush the toilets (and I couldn't hold it until the end of the trip).
I didn't go to work on Friday. I instead took care of a few minor chores. Cat did go to work for a half day (he's on summer hours) and had initially planned to meet me at home. We thought we'd go to Union Station from there. Apparently though, Cat didn't tell his boss that he was cutting out even earlier that everyone else on Friday, so he called me up to tell me that he'd meet me at the train station instead. Travel generally makes me tense because I am afraid that something horrible will go wrong (i.e., I forget my ticket or my ID at home, or the el or bus breaks down on my way to the airport or train station, etc.), and I'll miss my chance to get to my destination. This made me uneasy, for it was another thing that could go wrong.
We did meet at the train station. We did get on the train on time. We even got on earlier enough to sit together. We almost even left on time (I have traveled Amtrak to Michigan and back over thirty times, and I've been on-time exactly twice).
Our train car had intermittent AC.
I had worn shorts for this eventuality, though Cat had not because he came to the train station straight from work. A conductor offered to move everyone in our car. Cat and I thought we could tough it out because the car started off cool. By the time we realized our mistake (somewhere between Michigan City and Niles), it was too late to find seats together in the air-conditioned cars. Cat changed into his shorts in the bathroom, and I bought sodas and water in the cafe car. The ninety-something degree heat outside the train was cooler than the interior. We suffered, but we made it.
My mom's house has no AC either.
And the wedding was outside, which also has no AC.
Saturday was still in the nineties.
Me to my sister: "Sweating is my least favorite activity."
And later to my mom: "The parts of my body that are not polite to talk about in mixed company are dripping with sweat."
She said the same was true for her.
The ceremony was brief, and nice. This is the second time I've seen my mom marry, and I liked this ceremony better. My sister and I were both participants. We each handed a rose to a parent or future-step-parent respectively, and they exchanged the roses with each other. My mom said she found the rose ceremony on-line somewhere. I like it better than the unity candle--the roses don't blow out unexpectedly, or drip hot wax everywhere. Plus the words that the minister spoke that go along with the ceremony were great. Maybe I'll track the ceremony down sometime and post a link to it.
Everyone not in the ceremony was dressed very casually except for Cat, who wore a dress shirt and tie like I did. My uncles both wore Hawaiian shirts, shorts, and sneakers. Poor Jeff (my new step-dad) wore his new suit, including the suit jacket. My aunt (my mom's maid of honor), my mom and my sister were all lucky enough to have light and breezy dresses. I think guys should have more options when it comes to formal attire. I want something light and breezy that I can wear in the heat, and still look formal in.
The reception afterwards was fun. I saw many friends of the family I hadn't seen in about five or six years. Some were still twitchy and tense about my relationship with Cat, but no one said anything stupid. Some even seemed to remember Cat's name (though I think they probably asked someone else ahead of time before re-introducing themselves). Food happened. Toasting happened. Drinking happened. Dancing happened. Smoking happened. I got very, very stoned with my aunt. Two of my cousins hooked up with two family friends. Knowing all of the principals, I doubt either pairing will last very long, but they all looked very happy. After seeing all the hooking-up that goes on at weddings, I've decided that weddings are the straight equivalent of a gay men's bathhouse.
The trip back was uneventful. A car on the train had no AC, but it wasn't our car this time, so that was okay.
My mom is now married, and has a new last name. I called her by her new name a few times to get the feel of it. She looked very happy each time I said it.
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